Boundaries Exist to Protect

Our culture today does not think much of the Biblical standards on sex and marriage. To many they seem old fashioned or out of place with reality. The laws seem to suppress our desires and human nature to a point of controlling our freedom to enjoy life. But this is the deception of the lie that man can live without boundaries that are imposed upon the desires of humanity. What we think is suppressing our freedom is in fact boundaries that protect the health of our souls so that we can live-out faithful loving relationships that care for all people.

Know where in the Bible does God hate or reject sex as a good thing. For it was God who created us with sexual organs and desires. But the truth is for one to gain ultimate satisfaction and intimacy, which manifests true unfailing love one must have boundaries. It is these boundaries that promote intimacy that flows out of the family unit into the community, which keeps society functioning. The idea of saving sex for marriage and keeping sex between a married couple bound for life these days seems kind of out of touch with reality. But as I hope to show the more you walk away from the perfect standard the more unconditional love is trashed and twisted and society starts to break down.

The first question that we must ask is ‘What is marriage any way”? Is marriage just a social construction that joins “Whoever” together for a season while love is felt? Or is marriage a Covenant that binds two couples together for life to manifest the love of God to each member of the marriage. These two views have two totally different views on what “love” means and also on what is the purpose of marriage.

Biblical Principles Shape Moral Sex
God designed sex to work as a relationship between persons, not things. The first positive principle is that sex must be personal. Sex is designed to express a truly meaningful level of human relationships. If sex occurs denying personal value, then people are turned into sex objects, with no care for ones emotional well being. To have a personal relationship with a spouse is to value their soul and inner qualities and characters traits. To love their strengths and weaknesses, caring about their feelings. This promotes trust, safety, and dignity and worth that makes them feel connected in a faithful loving relationship.
Because sex was designed to be a relationship uniting persons made in the image of God, it cannot be treated as a commodity in which people are treated as if they are impersonal objects. This reduces people to objects that are valued only for performance.
Once one-steps back from this first principle they become selfish, turning unconditional love, into impersonal lust. Once love loses its relationship power, this rejection flows from the family unit into society and manifests in comminutes which then don’t respect any one for their personal worth as a human being.

Sex Must be Exclusive (Unique)

Biblical teaching demands that sex be a part of marriage and not before. God made sex special, so special in fact he wants us to treat each sexual relationship as something that is “one of a kind”. A person with whom you have sex is not someone who should be treated as if he or she were replaceable or could be exchanged. God’s plan for sex transcends the material value of physical performance. It is about showing one person your ultimate love in a way that expresses sexual power that is so intense that your love and experience is for your spouse alone. Sex is powerful! So why trash it by giving it to every one. Nonexclusive sex is a message that tells your partner “You are nothing special” feelings comes and go, I’ve had these feeling with others…Sex is not just about pleasure and feelings, it is about love which lasts when pleasure and feelings pass. Sex is one of the ways of expressing your love of commitment and faithfulness to your spouse. Sharing around just cheapens your love and worth for your spouse. When sex is reduce to just sleeping with who ever, the experience becomes what one worships instead of loving the person whom is your only unique.

Sex must be Intimate

The third positive principle is that human relationships must be intimate. Besides being personal and exclusive, sex must also involve intimacy because it is a relationship designed to be deeply meaningful and profound. Sex must be intimate because God designed sex to join souls and not just bodies. Sex is to manifest true love and edify each other for the love one has for each other. A Marriage is about two becoming one, working together to draw out the goodness that is in each other and in accepting each other faults by openly forgiving each other and reconciling your unconditional love back to each other. Marriage was never supposed to be easy, it is a covenant that teaches us to love.
Marriage creates a climate where this love is put to the test. The highest standard of love is unconditional love and it is in marriage that this claim of love is tested. Marriage is to bring to people who are created in the image of God together to learn to love through the struggles to manifest the character of God to each other being bound in a covenant of unconditional love. It causes us to learn to love, forgive, respect, being faithful so we don’t hurt our spouse. It is to endure sufferings to manifest a love that suffers long, which is not based on pleasure or feelings that change over time. It is a love that is to express the love of God that is working through us.

Sex must be Fruitful

The fourth principle is that moral sex bound by marriage is to be productive. Sex is not just for our own pleasure. But produces offspring, children that are to be part of a loving faithful relationship. They are to be born into a relationship that is to be a model that teaches and trains them to grow in the ways of Gods character, so when they grow up they can manifest God’s love to another. I’m not saying every time one has sex one must have a child, but this is one expression of bringing into being a little person to express love to. The Bible does also say that sex is for pleasure and intimacy to unit couples in a loving relationship which does not include having children, don’t get me wrong. But God does give this gift as a choice. When sex is just impersonal, nonexclusive, and non-intimate children arrive on the scene in an environment that has no connection to love or off belonging. They are just an accident and properly a burden to one's selfish pleasures.
For some they are such a burden that they are thrown away aborted.

Sex must be Selfless (Sacrificial)

A fifth principle is that sex must be selfless and sacrificial. God made sex enjoyable, but not for self-centered ways. Sex is meant to satisfy, but was not made for self-satisfaction. Love is a gift that must be given to another. Sex is an expression of your love for another and as you give your love and pleasure to another out of unconditional love, you will receive love and pleasure back. Sex is not about what we want, when we want it. The act must be done flowing from the right motives and care for the other spouse. Sex is more than just the physical. Sex was also meant to be complementary meaning that God has created a man for a woman as the fit together perfectly on many levels. They are different but complement each other. Selfish love, based on pleasure alone, is impersonal lust, and is not love.